21.36
fulham
busy,busy ...
post party ,i know its been too long to comment on the Sugar rush party,
most probably becasue i enjoyed myself too much then got really busy...
met Brandon and loads of beatiful Sb's but as always not everyone
was happy...
i guess it is very different for everyone,
specially for those who were hoping to find someone...
i wasnt and i know all i wanted was to have fun and a great evening
new friendships were made,some were gained and some were lost...
but as everything in life i dont want to linger on and just move on...
as always i question the events after the party and discussed it in length~
with my Darling who we both feel is not anymore an Sd...
we have crossed it and i know we are past the line...
although we are both happy for it xxx
i am in love ...
i felt sad as i know a lot of the girls i know deserve to have what they wanted out of it all...
my friends have felt quite disillusioned i think in some way,
ofcourse,if you have been waiting for a long time to find the right person
for that right arrrangement,this is one opportunity to have it...
but then again,if you will have it,that is the question ...
love ...
money...
security...
the all encompassing things we try to have...
we are lucky if we have them all
but with me...
i am in love
Sugarbowl is a very difficult world as i've learned,there were plenty of heartaches...
and for those who have been waiting for a long time ends up being frustrated...
what of the ones who were lucky enopough to have it?
is it just really luck???
my friends told me i was very lucky when he found me...
i knew it already xxx
but it wasnt easy,we worked hard to have it,
but also because He made me feel it wasnt hard at all...
it was a journey we both were happy to do..
holding each others hands,giving comfort and assurances along the way...
and a lot of Love...
something that cant be bought with money...
and loyalty and trust...
it is so rare i dont know who has the same arrangement aside from us?
was it just luck?
i am inlove...
work has been a killer and i cant believe we are leaving for our trip tomorrow...
i couldnt sleep when he went away for two days..
felt lost somehow knowing he was far...
it felt like eternity...
sat on my bed,not quite sure what to do...
is He alright? its lunch is He having it now?
at night i thought,i am sleepy should i say goodnight?
you see,
He made our lives entwined together,the best way He can to make me happy..
He is away and yet i know He is here...
tomorrow i know i will see Him there...
with my suitcase and all the love i can take with me...
to make Him happy xxx
i have butterflies thinking about it!!!
how excited i feel for tomorrow and all that will happen when we are together...
just a few months and its a year since we've met...
i cant believe we are still together...wow
a lot of things has happened in the months that passed...
it wasnt easy,there were a lot of challenges,
it has been a difficult start of the year ...
but for me who continually face hardships,it is nothing compared to most things...
i get bad days,sad days,lonely days like everybody else..
sometimes i feel that He maybe tired of my moaning sometimes!!! haha
but He is always here for me..more than anyone ever did...
i am in love...
moving to somewhere i will have for me and also for Him...
it is a start of something new,and i know it wont be easy...
but i have to be strong to face all of it as there is nothing good gained from things
that were done easily...
i am happy with what i have and what i dont have...
things will be right for me ,in time...
when the right time comes...
i have to be patient...
He is here ,always here...
i am in love...
tomorrow we will be together,
i cant explain it but i know it always feels right from the beginning
to be with Him..
how right it feels to be held by Him,
kissed,caressed,looked after,
loved by Him...
He is a man, a man worthy of everything i can give Him to make Him happy
xxx
